That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
