is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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