Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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