is your mom at the bar?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
