Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
