what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
