i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
