Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
