I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
