how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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