And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
