is your mom at the bar?
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
