totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
