Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
