its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
