people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Say something about gay babies.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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