you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
