Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
i've created a new STD.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
