bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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