I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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