Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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