it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I need mimosas to revive my soul
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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