I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
