I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
