I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
