I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
