Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
