I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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