Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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