Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
