She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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