I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
