I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
