garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
