And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
