Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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