worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
