The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
