Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
