I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
