Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
