She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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