super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize