How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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