I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize