I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I've blown a few things in my day
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
whose parrot is this?
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
