i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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