i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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