Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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