Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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